Sunday, July 13, 2008
And they're home...
DS 2 with SWEATY t-shirt and shorts, said: "I am glad I was born when I was, because I NEVER could have been a pioneer...like on the Oregon Trail."
DH: You wouldn't have known any different.
DS 2: OK, well, if they ever create time travel, I'll only be going forward! Cause I can't travel without air conditioning!
DS 1 concurred.
Oh the joys of text....
Here's a summary of the texts and calls I have received. Each ** represents another time in the day.
** From DS 2: "We're going to go to Toby Keith's restaurant." From Me: "Do you both know how to manage your money?" DS 2: "We're fine, Mom!"
**From Me: "Do you even know how to drive from Oklahoma to Florida?" From DS 1: We mapquested it.
**From DS 2: "We were going to leave tonight (Friday), but D is being a bit cranky and so we're leaving in the morning." From Me: "Oh THAT ought to be a fun ride home!" From DS 2: "Yeah tell me about it."
**From Me (on Saturday) to DS 1: "Are you guys getting along?" From DS 1: "No, we can't stand each other."
**From Me to DS 2 (later in the day): "Are you guys getting along?" From DS 2: "Yeah, surprisingly well." In my head: "That's a boy thing...they can be duking it out one moment and best friends the next. I don't get it, but it's one of the things I wish I could do better."
** From DS 1: "I think I just saw Old Dan and Little Ann. We're in the Ozarks!" {Mother note...he LOVED Where the Red Fern Grows}
** From One of them (can't remember which): "We just passed the national headquarters for Sonic! Thought you'd want to know. {Mother note...they know which Diet Coke their Mother loves best.}
** From DS 2: "Can you look on the Internet and see if you can find a Fazoli's in Memphis?" I did, but it was nowhere near where they were. From Me: "Boys, you'll just have to keep driving. And is that a CAT I hear in the background?" DS 2: "Yes, we have two cats that Z had to bring back, too. And by the way, did you know the car doesn't have air conditioning?" In my head only: "Oh to be young again!"
**From DS 1: "Mom the Smoky Mountains are really smoky tonight." From Mom: "That's cool." In my head: "At least they're living up to their names."
**From DS 1: "We just passed a lake with an island and the mountains in the background." From Mom: "cool"...In my head: "Calgon...take me
** From DS 1: "Driving through the Smoky's tonight I thought about you. I said, "My Mom loves the Smokies!" From Mom: "Did you sing Rocky Top for me?" DS 1: "Good Ol' Rocky Top..." In My Head: "I've raised good boys!!"
This afternoon:
**From Me: "What's your status?" DS 1: We're stopping at Wendy's for lunch. We drove through rain this morning and a cat pooped in the car, so we've been having to push through. In my head: "Oh yeah, they're driving with no A/C and aroma de cat..." To my DS: "Oh my gosh, I can NOT imagine driving with two cats in the car!" DS 1: "Yeah, we didn't know about them until we got out there." In my head: "My boys are really good friends to others..."cause I might have just hopped a flight back and wished my friend the best...OK maybe not.
Still they are good and seem to be making their way through Georgia relatively well. And, if their text messages are any indication, they DO occasionally think about home.
Saturday, July 12, 2008
Photo Hunt: Support
Thursday, July 10, 2008
A Pleasant Surprise
As I've mentioned this week, my niece and nephew are in town staying at their Grandparents. Earlier in the week, it was suggested that I consider taking my niece to see the new movie Kit Kittredge: An American Girl.My FIL and I discussed timing and we agreed that he would take the boys to see one movie while I took her to this movie.
Remember that I am a "Boy-Mom" who WANTS (but doesn't really have yet) a "pink room". My life is pretty well filled with all things "male". BUT, I have been to Chicago. I have visited The American Girl Store on more than one occasion. I even showed the one to my DH when we were in NYC and tried to explain why it was surrounded by young girls with their precious dolls for almost an entire city block. I explained it was a good thing we had boys, but if we have Grandaughters, we will DEFINITELY spend more time there. I even hosted American Girl author, Valerie Tripp, when she visited my school several years ago.
This does not, however, make me an American Girl aficionado. I actually didn't even know this movie existed until this whole conversation came up. In fact, I really didn't know much about the doll, Kit, or her character, either. I did, of course, agree to go...especially since I found out that my niece IS not only an American Girl expert, but a Kit specialist (she's read all the books). I think she was surprised that my DS 4 wanted to go with us, but she didn't seem to mind.
The three of us armed ourselves with popcorn, skittles, water, soda, and sour patch candy (even though we'd just eaten lunch) and went to our theater leaving Grandpa and M to go to the other one. When we walked into the theater, I immediately wondered if I read the sign on the door right. I was certain the sign said this was our movie, but the theater was filled with several older couples, a few "single" movie watchers, and perhaps 2 other kids. Just 2. For a KIDS' movie. We sat down and I prepared to tell the kids I had taken us into the wrong theater.
But I had not.
Once I figured that out, I decided it'd be fun to see just how long the men in the room (and even some of the women) lasted for the movie. In fact, I was fairly certain THEY had gone into the wrong theater. But they did not budge.
It wasn't long into the movie before I realized the appeal for this crowd. The movie takes place in 1934. It definitely sheds some light on The Great Depression Era from this young girl's perspective. The music delightfully transports you to that time. The storyline kept me engaged the entire time and even had me shedding a few tears.
When Kit was faced with her Father leaving town to go find work, she notes something like, "It's not right if we're not together." And I heard my DS 4 respond, "Yeah, that's the truth!" It was a sweet Mom-moment for me. And a couple of times my niece even helped me know what was about to happen and/or why it was happening--which was a special Aunt-moment.
Steeped in the "good things happen to people who don't give up" storyline are the important messages of loving and serving one another regardless of socio-economic background and/or skin color. For me it was a pleasant surprise. In fact, I even found myself thinking that perhaps I should read the books in order to share them with some of "my girls" at school next year.
Whether you have an "American Girl" in your life or not, this movie is a good clean summer choice with a happy ending. Add a sweet niece and DS 4, and it was a great way to spend a hot summer afternoon!
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
It's true...
Last night I found myself talking about bodily functions with my brother that I used to cringe about when I heard "older people" discussing. I mean I always wondered why it makes national news when the President of the US goes and sees his Urologist. And now here I am having an ailment conversation that made my DS 3 blush! Oy!!
Today, my DSs 1 and 2 left for Oklahoma on a plane. They will meet their friend, Z, there and drive with him back to Florida.
Now DSs 1 and 2 are 20 and 18 respectively. I found myself wondering if DH should walk them inside the airport and help them navigate. He didn't.
I shudder a bit at them driving alone from Oklahoma to Florida...even though they are three young men who collectively know more about automobiles than I do. I mean when did they get old enough to do THAT???
I took my niece and DSs 3 and 4 to a bounce house last night. I found myself fretting if I didn't know where they were at all times...even though we were in a closed-in room with only one exit.
Yep, my feet are firmly planted in my forties for sure!
Monday, July 07, 2008
Be Still and Know...
My trip to Alaska taught me something about this.
It happened for me in this place:
This is Prince William Sound near Anchorage, Alaska. We floated in there the final night of our cruise. While standing out on the deck, all you could hear was peace and quiet. This was amazing because there were literally hundreds of people out on the decks taking in the glorious sights. In fact, it was so quiet that you could hear the ice bergs melting in the water.
Saturday, July 05, 2008
I'm Back!!!
At last, I am ready to start sharing some of the beauty of our Alaskan trip and will post more when I can. Below you will find my picks from more than 1000 photos from days 1 - 3 alone!! Don't worry, I narrowed it down to about twenty.
I PROMISE I will check in on all my blogging friends very soon.
Friday, June 27, 2008
Book Review: If You Lived Here, I'd Know Your Name
I brought plenty to read while I've been here in Alaska, but shifted my focus when a local Haines Resident shared this book title with me: If You Lived Here, I'd Know Your Name by Heather Lende. First, let me tell you a bit about Haines from my point of view. DH and I went to Haines on a ferry from Skagway. From there, we were taken by Larry, the bus driver out to a small fish camp where we took a scenic river boat tour of the valley.
In our 30 minute drive out to the camp, Larry told us about life in Haines. It is a small town in Alaska that has 2400 "locals"...Apparently there are about 900 people who live in the city area. They have no postal delivery, so they meet at the post office to pick up their mail. It's quite a social affair. This is a subsistence community, which means people there rely on what they can hunt, grow, or catch to sustain them. Haines is listed as one of the top ten places for people who are millionaires (and need no other income) to move, because it's "one of the most perfect places on Earth".
Larry explained what life is like during the long winter months. He told us how neighbors have to care for neighbors. And he told us that this is a place that you "have to love to live in". He even told us about his wife who is a member of the "Ripinsky Rippers", a quilting club that meets regularly in women's homes...and his wife doesn't quilt! She just likes to be with the ladies.
And Larry mentioned that there was even a book written about Haines.
Ever intrigued by the small town life and finding out that Heather Lende and her husband, Chip came to Alaska to visit on their honeymoon and never left, I made a mental note to find that book. Heather is a columnist for the Anchorage Daily News and writes the obituaries for every Haines resident who passes on.
How pleased I was when I was in an independent bookstore in Sitka that featured books written by Alaskans. DH and I both finished the book in the past three days. And I have really fallen in love with Haines, Alaska (no, I don't intend to move and never go home). The book is a sweet picture of life in small town America with the wilderness of Alaska thrown in the mix.
I was even more excited this morning to open up the Anchorage Daily News and find an article by the author herself. A sidebar noted that she has a second book coming out soon.
If you like memoir, reading about real life in real places, considering the convergence of belief systems, cultures, and/or environment, then you would love this book.
We spent a very wet rainy day rafting down the river between icebergs and below a glacier today. It was still simply amazing. Tomorrow, we head up to the Denali, or Mt. McKinley, area via train. We will be in Talkeetna for the day, then leave on a red-eye flight tomorrow night.
I'm looking forward to coming home and sharing more stories and pictures with friends and family.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Just a Glimpse...
Last night, while visitng Prince William Sound, and seeing the Harvard Glacier, I said to DH, "This all seems so surreal." I mean there simply are no words for that which takes your breath
I found myself repeatedly feeling intoxicated by the clean fresh air that is aplenty in this state, yet sobered and awestruck at each changing view of scenery.
It is simply amazing.
These are just preliminary photos that I clipped out of DH's uploaded files. We have hundreds that will need to be considered for publication. In the meantime, know that this is a place that makes a Christian want to stand upon the mountain, applaud His creation, and exclaim: "HOW GREAT IS OUR GOD!"
(We are off for two days of inland tours via train. I'll check in again when I can.
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Another Alaskan Check-in (and a Correction)
I must have had too much fresh air because the last time I wrote, we were leaving Ketchikan and heading to Juneau. Today we are in Skagway. The temperatures have been pretty good...about 50 most days and only one day of rain so far.
Yesterday, our visit to the glacier was simply amazing! We actually flew there by helicopter, they put us on the top of it with a guide and special shoes. We walked and looked at the crevices and water falls. Incredible! We went whale watching. I can't wait to show you some of the pics my DH shot out there. He actually got the perfect "tail shot"! Then we topped it off with an outdoor grilled salmon bake at an old gold mine. Can you say YUM????
Today we cruised in an eagle preserve and nature hunt in the valley of the Chinook (sp?) mountains outside of Haines Alaska. It, again, was simply breathtaking. Even breathing is something special as you can tell how fresh and clean the air really is up here. It's also fun talking to to the "natives" as they tell us what life is like when there aren't all these cruise ships coming and going. They actually have to learn to hunt meat, fish, and harvest berries on their own in order to make it through the long winter months. We ended our boat trip with a hot dog cookout beside the river. We didn't get to see moose or bear, but another group did see bear on their trip. They're out there...that's for sure...cause we at least saw their "droppings"!
Tonight is our second formal night on the ship. Ship life hasn't been quite as great as our past cruises, but it all pales in comparison to the nature show that goes on around us each and every minute.
Currently the sun is up for 18 hours a day. That's something to get used to as well.
Tomorrow we go on an "otter tour" in Sitka. Can't remember just what all that entails, but I'm sure we'll have more to share soon. Sitka is also known for it's "Reindeer Hotdogs" that are sold on the street corners. I'm planning to give one a try.
Then it's on up to Whittier/Anchorage where we'll leave our ship and take two days of train trips and another glacier tour.
Hope you're all well. I PROMISE I'll check blogs as soon as I get home. Right now, Internet is costing us 40 cents a minutes, so time online is quite precious.
Hugs from the North!!
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Hello from Alaska!!
We have taken hundreds of pictures...which I cannot upload here due to slow internet connection. There is no way that words can express the beauty we are seeing. The "naturalist" on our ship calls out each time she spots whales and other wildlife. In fact, we are waiting for the whale watching to start tonight.
Tomorrow we take a helicopter ride...yes, you read that right too...to a glacier. We'll land there and be able to walk around the glacier. Then later on we'll go on a whale watch and salmon bake in the evening.
This trip has been an enormous blessing....and with each trip airborne, I've felt much peace. Thank you all for your prayers.
I'll check in again soon!
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
When the Glacier Melts...
DH made arrangements for our "Plan B" of travel. He rebooked airline flights, planned several daytrips, extended our hotel stay in Anchorage. I, on the other hand, took the kids to the Science Museum--determined to do some little "staycations" while we awaited our departure next week.
On my way to the museum, DH called and said, "She called, and we have a spot. Do you want to go tomorrow?" The glacier was melting, the only thing we had to see is if we were willing to CHANGE back all of our plans to "plan A" with the exception of finding a new flight, since , according to the original plan A, we'd be part of the way there by the time we found this out.
DH called her back to be sure we'd have a balcony and that the plane would work. When he looked online it looked like there is a flight leaving tomorrow morning at o'dark hundred, but it was pretty full, so he wanted to be sure I'd be OK not sitting together.
Now, are you ready for this?
The upgrade for our room is ONE UP from the original one I made that caused all this trouble to begin with and is LESS than the original upgrade cost. OK...it's m--eeee---llll--tt--ii---n--ggg.
The plane fare was able to be charged to DH's mileage plan at no cost...and he's able to have a credit for a future flight...much better deal than paying the high price to switch itineraries last minute. m--eeee---llll--tt--ii---n--ggg...
There are two seats together on all flights. AND we don't have to do the little prop job that he had originally booked. Rather than THREE planes to get there, it's only going to take two. (I think this is more than "melting"...it's like HUGE CHUNKS of ice falling right into the water.)
AND...he was able to get the hotel stay at the end of the trip, before we do the now infamous train ride, on points as well. MELTED!!
We're booked...we're leaving tomorrow...God is good...
And I'm thanking HIM in a big way!
Monday, June 16, 2008
Update and Book Review: One Thousand White Women
Now, for a review my latest "read"...

One Thousand White Women by Jim Fergus is, in his words, a work of "semi-historical" fiction. It is written as a series of journal entries by the main character, May Dodd, a young woman from Chicago society who has two children born out of wedlock and was later sent to an asylum by her family due to her promiscuity.
While there, Dodd learns of a government sponsored program where 1000 white women are going to be given as wives to the Cheyenne in order to help assimilate the Indians into the white man's world. The remainder of the story chronicles her journey, both physical and spiritual, into a world very different from the one she's known.
The Colorado Springs Gazette notes:
The best writing transports readers to another time and place, so that when they reluctantly close the book, they are astonished to find themselves returned to their everyday lives. One Thousand White Women is such a book. Jim Fergus so skillfully envelops us in the heart and mind of his main character, May Dodd, that we weep when she mourns, we shake our fist at anyone who tries to sway her course, and our hearts pound when she is in danger.
I loved the spiritual thread that is woven quite well through this book. Fergus explores many "issues" of Christian missions through the characters of Reverend Hare, an Episcopal priest who accompanies the first "wave of women" to the field. His fire and brimstone mannerisms turn people away and while he's regarded as "holy", it's only in the sense that he is set apart from others. When a transgression of his is discovered, the gentle monk, Brother Anthony takes his place as the "Christian presence" among the pagans. Anthony is such a picture of God's mercy and grace and love for all. Yet, that is not the crux of the book. It is only one thread that is woven through this powerful story.
If you liked the television show, "Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman", then you would probably love this book. Fergus paints quite a picture of what life must have been like for the Cheyenne people as they faced the white man coming in to take over the western plains. It's a powerful reminder that we all could be a little more tolerant of those who are different from us, whether it be skin color, culture, or belief systems.
I think Winston Groom, the author of Forrest Gump, says it best as he sums up Fergus' work: "It's a superb tale of sorrow, suspense, exultation, and triumph that leaves the reader waiting to turn the page and wonderfully wrung out at the end."
Sunday, June 15, 2008
Friday, June 13, 2008
Update
When I went to upgrade the room this past Spring, there was a SMALL charge. I thought the lady told me she took care of all of it via my account during the phone call, but apparently she did not. Therefore, it looked like we had an outstanding balance on our trip. If you don't "pay" by a certain date, then your trip is cancelled. This is what happened to us. (I will not go into just how teensy weensy the fraction of the cost of a total cruise this balance was, but suffice it to say, it was less than any one of you might believe.)
There are still no rooms on the ship. They have tried to switch dates, but we simply can't make that happen since we have a train trip that is non-refundable/transferable. Last week three customers canceled their cruise last minute (within 3 - 5 days of sailing). Today is five days before.
We are first on the waiting list to get in should anyone cancel their reservation. We have a new "friend" at Carnival who will be checking for us each and every day to see if someone cancels.
If they do not cancel, and we still have no room, DH and I will shift our dates and flight destination so that we can still do the train. Then we will take a cruise in the Gulf in July. With this plan, we'll still get to see a small part of Alaska...just for a shorter time.
All in all the cruise company is being as helpful as I think we could expect them to be.
I know it will all work out...and am thankful that we will be able to use our voucher for "something" even if this isn't it. Still praying for the "glacier" to move if it can.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Prayer Request
We have bumped into a "Glacier Sized" snafu in our cruise plans for next week. I know these notices on my blog send family into a frenzy to find out "what's going on". I'll elaborate later, but currently there is "NO ROOM in the CARNIVAL INN" with our name on it. The reason I am posting now is to ask for prayer from those of you who are "pray-ers". Please pray that the mountain will move and all will work out. Sunday, June 08, 2008
How full's the glass?
This week I tried to do that with something I have been facing. You might remember that my DH won a free 7 day cruise for two anywhere Carnival goes on our anniversary trip last year. And I think I've told everyone that we've chosen to go to Alaska to use our vouchers. Of course, our "free" cruise is getting more expensive by the minute as we plan for airfare and the excursions...but the bulk of it is "free" nonetheless.
I'm excited. I am. My problem is that you have to take several airplane trips to get there and several more to come home. And those of you that know me know that doesn't excite me one bit.
So, to alleviate my anxiety, I'd like to say "I've been praying and fasting and have given it all to God." But that would be a half-truth.
Instead, I did my own search of the FAA website last week. When you go there, you can look at data and statistics about daily aircraft incidents throughout the entire US. And when you look at it in that perspective, the "incidents" are miniscule at best and really almost non-existant on the big carriers.
I was feeling a great deal better and less anxious the more I read. I was confirming what I know in my head is true. I saw the stats and they tell me that all will be well. Then, my eyes caught another link on this site called "Alaska Accidents"...WHAT!?!?! Can you believe that Alaska has its own private section on the FAA website? No other state...just the ONE I am going to. It seems that there is an initiative to reduce the number of general aviation accidents in this state. Re-enter anxiety....sort of. I mean it didn't come on as strong. But it was there, festering somewhere beneath the surface. (Alaska, by the way, relies on aviation more heavily than other states for travel due to the terrain.)
And so I have found myself in an anxious tug-o-war about our trip. I have moments of complete sanity and courage...and then I have moments of sheer panick and anxiety. In fact, if you heard the voices in my head, I am fairly certain you might run for cover!
Then I read Linda's post about "Hodophobia". This term is defined as the "fear of traveling" which is a bit different than a "fear of flying" which, according to Linda, is called, "Pteromerhanophobia". And although I was riveted learning about these two terms, I was more moved by the realization that Linda had in church yesterday when she listened to a sermon about living as an example. That's when her post nailed me right between the eyes. She writes:
Uh, yeah, what SHE said! (Hey, Linda, isn't that the name of the conference?)Looking at me in my paralyzation, would anyone want to trust in the God I
worship? I felt so ashamed that ultimately my fear revealed a lack of faith. If
I believe (to cite one of many examples of God's power) that God parted the Red
Sea, do I not believe he can get me from the Charlotte airport to Embassy
Suites?....I can do this trip because with God (and the limo guy) all things are possible!
So I leave one week from tomorrow for a glorious trip to the great state of Alaska with my dear sweet husband. Today I have done what I should have done long before I started researching the FAA website. I have given the trip and my anxiety about it to God. And I've asked him to help me in those moments of doubt and unbelief for it is in those moments when I let go and his grace sustains me that I can truly say to others:
"My God shall supply all my needs." (Phil. 4:19) and "You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance." (Psalm 32:7) and "When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me?" (Psalm 56:3-4).
And most of all...my glass (or cup)? It "runneth over"!
Saturday, June 07, 2008
You're nobunny till somebunny moves in for the summer...
Several weeks-maybe even months-back, DS 4 came home and said, "Mom, would you mind if we babysat a bunny this Summer?" Since this is not your normal 9yo request, and I was a bit distracted at the time, I gave the best "Mom answer" I could come up with at the time: "We'll see."
I know I wasn't totally focused on the initial conversation. In fact, I am also certain that we talked about it more than once. OK HE talked...I, uh,
Not long after the initial request, I came home one time to find my DH, my DS 4, 3 or 4 neighborhood kids, and a Mother I did not know, in my DS 4's room. Now to say I was mortified at this is simply an understatement. DH came out to assure me that all was OK. The Mother and girls wanted to bring their bunny over to "meet" our bunny for "when we watched her this Summer". When DH told me that the Mother had been here watching the bunnies "get to know each other" for over 2 hours, I couldn't believe it. Then the Mother came out, introduced herself to me and told me just how important it was for them to have a few visitation days if they are going to spend time together.
Now I am no pet hater, but they are RABBITS. I am fairly certain that no amount of "getting-to-know-you-courtship" would prepare them for a rendevouz that was to take place several weeks down the road. I love pets as much as your average pet-owner. I do not, however, treat my pets like they are people. But I am also someone who prays regularly to make relationships with the neighbors, so I didn't question it--I smiled and said, "Yeah, they seem to be getting along well." I did what any level-headed person would do, I ignored the whole thing and let DH handle it. Two more visits followed that one. Each visit meant that several children, and often the Mother, would sit in my DS 4's room watching these two bunnies hop around and "visit one another".
Over time, more pieces were added to my "bunny puzzle". DS 4 told me that he was to be the babysitter for the month of June while this family is in Israel for their daughter's Bat Mizvah. Their bunny is "fixed" so it cannot have babies. He promised to "feed it, clean the cage, and do a really good job" while this family is away celebrating this very important event. Through gritted teeth...and with the clear visual in mind of just WHO does the weekly cage cleaning...I agreed.
Fast forward to last night. I come home from a long day at work and a workout and DS 4 says, "Mom come in here." I got my second foot in the door and promptly headed to his room where I see Bella, the neighbor's bunny, in OUR bunny cage. Our bunny is out running around DS 4's room. DS 4 shows me Bella's back that has a huge hunk of hair missing and says, "Button did that when they were in his cage together." I asked just where Bella's cage was and found out that Bella doesn't HAVE a cage! She sleeps on their porch in a doggie crate at night. She runs free out there all day!
Somewhere in this conversation I also found out that Bella will be spending the ENTIRE Summer here at our house! Like, as in until AUGUST when school starts. As I walked away from his room with visions of dead rabbit in my head, I must confess there were NOT happy thoughts running through my mind. In fact, for a fleeting moment, I thought "this reaching out to the neighbors thing is a bit overrated!"
Last night, Bella slept in her "new digs" the dog crate that held my DS 2's "birthday duck". Of course, there's bedding all over the floor today, but no bunny is taking a bite out of another one. And more important, there are not bunny p**p balls all over DS 4's floor. And today I went out shopping for a new bunny cage to donate to Bella's cause. Cause one thing is for sure, if they're living under MY roof, they're gonna abide by MY rules.
There will be NO bunny cage visitations this Summer. They can visit between the bars as far as I'm concerned.
This might just be one LONG Summer!
Friday, June 06, 2008
Book Review: Stolen Innocence
I'll bet some of you think I haven't read for months! I have read plenty, but I've only finished two books this Spring. My latest read is Stolen Innocence by Elissa Wall. This book is the powerful and at times hard-to-fathom story of a girl who grew up in a polygamous sect, was forced to marry at the age of 14, and then later was part of the court case against its leader.Although she grew up in Utah and Arizona, this is the same group that has recently been in the news in Texas. Admittedly, this book helped me think a bit differently about the women and children that we've seen in the news and the religion as a whole.
Wall shares piece by piece and bit by bit her story of growing up in this culture. She has eleven brothers and twelve sisters. Her biological father had three wives when she was little. She weaves a tapestry of women who dearly love their children and men who truly believe they are doing the right thing by following the earthly "prophet" who supposedly has the direct line to God.
She tells of moments of chastening where wives and children are "reassigned" by the "prophet" to another Husband/Father when a family is not in control. This is what happened to Elissa and her family. She says that upon reassignment, they are taught that the DNA of the children is passed on to the new Father. The other Father is completely gone and contact with him does not happen.
Wall explains what happens when people question the faith and the teachings. People who choose to leave are often completely disconnected from their relatives who remain "inside". This happened to several of her siblings many years before she left. And it has now happened for her as she has no contact with her Mother or two younger sisters today.
There were many times while I read this book that I wondered just HOW some of this stuff happens in America. I think it really comes down to control. It starts with the youngest children and continues as they grow.
Here's what she notes about her schooling and how the leader ran it:
Unapproved pictures were removed from textbooks, and anything that had to do
with evolution or human anatomy was excised. In fact, anything that did
not conform to our strict religious teachings and beliefs was removed from the
lesson plans, and pages of books that dealt with conflicting subject matter were
simply ripped out.
Control. Power. No freedom of thought. Teachings by one person and one person only.
In a short video on the Barnes and Noble website, she notes that this sort of thing can, and does, happen because these are people who are born into this way of life. It's all they know. It is their "normal". And because they have no additional knowledge or influence from the outside, for them, it is "right".
Wall was forced to marry her first cousin at the age of 14. She was raped and abused in this marriage, but told to stay in it. Apparently women are taught over and over again to "keep sweet". This means not to ruffle feathers. Don't question. Smile and stay sweet.
This book is well worth the read. It is a great glimpse into a different religion and culture. Elissa writes not as a condemnation of her family and their faith, but as a story of hope for women who are victimized as a result of these beliefs. As a consultant for the Texas government during the recent events, she notes that her desire was to ensure that "the men, women, and children were treated with kindness, understanding, and respect." She is an extremely brave young woman who faced the challenges and escaped and is now doing her part to help other women as a result.
I applaud that kind of courage.
Monday, June 02, 2008
His Journey Continues...
When he walked down the aisle first with the other three senior officers, my heart swelled with pride. He enjoyed walking with his friend, L and made the most of it as he laughed with her and smiled at those he passed.
As he walked across the stage to take that diploma I knew it represented the close of yet another chapter of his life, but at the same time the start of something new and exciting!And when he started posing for the camera from his place on the platform, I knew that there will always be a fun-loving child inside the man he is becoming!
When he stood up and gave his speech, I once again melted into tears. I know he is wise beyond his years. He knows they are standing on the brink of opportunity. He believes that it's important to stand up and make a difference in our world and he encouraged his classmates to do the same.
Later in the evening when the endless stream of friends came to our house, I prayed that he would be able to sift through his memory bank someday and look back on this moment as a very special one. One when he realizes just how rich his life truly is.

As I put my head on my pillow at the end of a very long day, I whispered a prayer of thanksgiving for my DS 2. I asked God to continue to bless him and direct his paths. I asked forgiveness and grace for those places when we fall and start thinking about all the things we wished we'd done. I thanked Him for a lovely way to close this chapter and start a new one...with DS 2's family and friends surrounding him. Most of all, I thanked Him for the prvilege of being a Mom to another special young man!
I love you, son!
{Edited to add: DS 2 did not wear flip flops to Graduation. This was long after the more formal attire came off. It was hot, so we let him just put on the "outerwear".}
