I believe that every person who crosses the path that defines your life and mine leaves a fingerprint. Some are more welcome than others. In some cases, the fingerprints fade over time. But they are there.
And in some cases, those fingerprints become an important part of our defining moments. Those moments that create WHO we are, and WHY we are, here in the present.
Last night, I learned that one such person who impacted my life left this Earth unexpectedly on Thursday evening. We really haven't kept in great touch over the last 22 years. But she is no less important in my mind or in my heart. We did have the opportunity to visit last year at the
50th anniversary of our childhood church. Looking back, I only wish I had had more time to sit and talk with her at that event. Or that I'd made the time afterwards.
Susan and I became BFFs before "BFFs" were all the rage. We met each other at church when we were 11 and 13 years old...although we had been going to church together since we were 4 and 6. Her Mother was our church organist (and still does the job there). Her Father was an usher and a trustee. Their family were charter members of the church.
When I entered the UMYF (Youth Group), I met Susan. We instantly clicked. Of course, it wasn't uncommon back then to meet "other Susan's", but we liked comparing the things that we had in common starting with our names. We each had younger brothers. We loved our families. Our Dad's worked for the same company. As our friendship grew, we shared EVERYTHING with one another. And I recall many times before one of us could drive, that our parents would drive us back and forth to each other's houses (almost a 30 minute drive) so that we could "hang out."
Our faith was being formed during those years. We talked hours and hours about God and who He was to us. We talked about what was right and what was wrong in the world. We sought out our purpose for existing here. We experienced many wonderful spiritual services in and through our church at that time.
As I reflected last night about all those memories I shared with Susan, beside our "faith talks and development," music was probably the biggest thing. We LOVED to listen to records...real vinyl ones...for hours. When 8-track tapes came in style, we listened to those too. Some of our favorites were: Linda Ronstadt, The Eagles, James Taylor, Carly Simon, Jackson Browne, Jimmy Buffett, Cat Stevens, and Billy Joel.
In fact, a few years ago, I was driving to Tampa and listening to the 70's station. On my way there, they seemed to play song after song that dredged up memory after memory of this time in my life. I remember driving up and down the beach to hear the Buffett album in it's entireity while eating Frosty's from Wendy's!! I remember choosing songs from these albums that made us think, and using them at our Youth Group meetings. I sent Susan and card shortly after that day to tell her what a neat walk down memory lane it was for me. She and I emailed with one another and "caught up" a bit after so many years.
And there were books. We shared a love for reading. She, for the more deep/thinking type books. I, for the more sappy/human-relationship type books. Still, it was because of Susan that I read
Flowers for Algernon, The Hobbit, and a nonfiction book by Hugh Prather,
Notes to Myself. It was also because of Susan that I
tried to read the "monster book",
Watership Down. I quickly got lost in the rabbit warrens and had to put the book down.
I also learned a little more about TV (and movie stars) during our friendship. We loved to watch
Starsky and Hutch and
Saturday Night Live (Mr. Bill and Roseanne Rosanna Danna). I remember going to the movies together to see
The Way We Were, A Star is Born, Silver Streak, Smokey and the Bandit, and
GREASE! In fact, I think we saw Grease more than five times in the theater that summer.
In addition to music, entertainment and books, there were trips with the Youth Group, working around the church, and weeks at their condo on the beach, vacations with my own family, just to name a few. Over the years, we laughed together and cried together. We fought. We became friends again. All of these things make up the fingerprint that this very special person had (and has) on my life.
Last night, as I was reminiscing, I pulled out my journal of "sappy teenage poetry" that I wrote back then. It also includes a collection of quotes that touched my teenage heart. She added some quotes from Hugh Prather in her own handwriting. Here are two that really struck me:
"Next time I will... From now on I will... --What makes me think I am wiser today than I will be tomorrow?" And the second, "I am what I started with, and when it is all over, I will be all that is left of me." And the third, "No one is wrong. At most someone is uninformed." (To which she added her own words, "I am never wrong!") Oh to be so young and naive again!
In there, I also found a letter from Susan to me. She wrote, and I believe these are HER words, "A friend is someone you can go to when you're scared and lost. Someone you can depend on, always." I thought, "Yeah, that defines my "take" on friendship still today." I think I learned what it all means to "be a friend" in those formative teenage years...from the fingerprint of my very best friend at that time.
And for that, I am forever thankful.