Book Review: Choosing to SEE

I still remember the night of May 21, 2008 when we saw a breaking news report about a child of Steven Curtis Chapman being in critical condition after an accident at the family's home.  The next morning, our local Christian station further reported and talked about the tragedy that had taken place in this family.  The Chapman's youngest adopted daughter, Maria, had been hit by a car driven by one of her brothers in the driveway of their Tennessee home.

I was heartbroken for this family as the station DJ's continued to share the story from their perspective.  Then, they traveled to Tennessee for the funeral of this little girl.  And I found myself grieving even more for them yet moved at how many ways they acknowledged the hope that was theirs in Christ especially in the midst of tragedy.

Now and then more reports would run on the news stations.  Some months later I even saw the entire family appear on Larry King Live and recount their journey with much humility and faith.  I remember watching portions of that clip and hearing how each of the older kids and adults were healing from the tragedy.  I thought, "Wow!  I wonder what my response would be in the same situation?"

One of the neat glimpses of God that the Chapman's got was the day after the accident after pleading with God to "show us something tangible so we can know Maria's with You!  Let us SEE you in this!"  Shortly after this prayer, they were retracing Maria's steps around the house and her Dad found a piece of notebook paper with a picture of a six-petaled flower with a stem and two leaves.  One petal was colored in blue (her favorite color).  The center was orange.  And written on the other side of the paper, next to a picture of a butterfly, Maria had written the word SEE (a word she'd not written before).  The family believes this picture was like Maria speaking to them from heaven saying "SEE?  Can you SEE?  Everything is going to be all right.  I am here with Jesus.  I am fine.  Heaven is real, the gospel is true, you just have to SEE!"

Nearly two and a half years following the loss of Maria, Mary Beth has written their story.  She doesn't just recount this one tragic, yet ashes to beauty chapter, of their lives. She starts at the beginning of her marriage to Steven.  Through her back story you get to know that Mary Beth is as much a "normal" woman with ups, downs, highs, lows, plans, and dreams as any of the rest of us.  I loved this as it allowed me to connect on so many levels.

Mary Beth begins by sharing just how polar opposite she and Steven are....and I thought, "Oh sister, I hear you!"  They married young (though younger than DH and me).  They didn't have two nickels to rub together early in their marriage.  They had their children young (and somewhat close together).  Her two boys are similar in age span to my two.  And even later in life, their adoption stories, though different than the one we are having right now, still strike similar cords.

Over and over again in her story, she says that her family has been entrusted to be stewards of this story.  I thought that was an interesting perspective on the pain that befalls all of us at one time or another.  It's important for us to be stewards, take what is evil and redeem it for good.  In fact, I LOVED learning that there is a "Part B" to the "SEE" message in Maria's little drawing.  I don't want to share it here because I don't want to spoil it for you.  Suffice it to say that again and again the Chapmans have been allowed to SEE just how God is using their story--Maria's story--to change the world.

Whether you are an SCC fan or not and/or have experienced grief or not, this story is one that deserves a place in the "to-be-read" pile.  For me, it became a "to-be-devoured" as I finished in two days.  It truly is, as the book jacket suggests, "A Journey of Struggle and Hope".  I'm so glad Mary Beth Chapman invited us along on her journey!

Every Light Counts

 Our church is launching a project called "Every Light Counts" as the Thanksgiving and Christmas season is upon us.  It's got me thinking a lot about just how powerful each one of us can be in our world.  We can send out a ripple of kindness that helps people see God's love in action.  For our church, we are asking each person to consider getting involved in one of the many servant events that we have happening over the next 5 or 6 weeks:

Serving meals at our local elementary school to families attending school events
Giving shoppers free coffee in the wee hours of black Friday shopping
Helping buy Christmas gifts for children who might not otherwise have them
Heading out to our neighborhood Christmas parade to hand out fun packs and glow sticks to kids
Taking snack packs to more than 400 mall employees after church

Today, while reflecting on the impact a little light can make, I was reminded of the song we used to sing in Sunday School..."This little light of mine...I'm going to let it shine."  And I realized that every person in the world has opportunity to be a light in someone else's life regardless of faith background or beliefs.  I wonder what would happen if we all started looking out for our neighbors?  What if we found ways to be kind when no one expected it?  For our church, we see it as an opportunity to help people know that God loves them right where they are.

I believe it's this type of kindness that could change the world because "Every LIGHT Counts"--yours and mine!  Why not try and be a light this holiday season?

Book Review: Mennonite in a Little Black Dress

{Note: To those who limit yourselves to only Christian fiction and/or nonfiction, this book may not be one you'd like to read.}

I have finished reading this little gem of a memoir that I picked up on a recent run through Target. The title caught my eye and the back cover blurb sealed the fate of the book to end up in my cart headed to the checkout line!

The back cover blurb reads:

Not long after Rhoda Janzen turned forty, her world turned upside down. It was bad enough that her husband of fifteen years left her for Bob, a guy he met on Gay.com, but that same week a car accident left her injured. Needing a place to rest and pick up the pieces of her life, Rhoda packed her bags, crossed the country, and returned to her quirky Mennonite family's home, where she was welcomed back with open arms and offbeat advice. (Rhoda's good-natured mother suggested she get over her heartbreak by dating her first cousin—he owned a tractor, see.)

Written with wry humor and huge personality—and tackling faith, love, family, and aging—Mennonite in a Little Black Dress is an immensely moving memoir of healing, certain to touch anyone who has ever had to look homeward in order to move ahead.

As I have shared in many of my book reviews, memoir is one of my favorite genres. I am drawn to it for some unknown reason. In this case, I could also add that I have an odd fascination with the Amish community and am thus also interested in hearing about the "break-off" group, the Mennonites. Jantzen notes that the Amish broke away from the Mennonites because they were too liberal. She writes, "A liberal Mennonite is an oxymoron if there ever was one."

The back cover is only a slightly pulled back curtain of the humor and truth that is found throughout this book. Here are some of my favorites:

Jantzen shares a bit about carrying lunch boxes to Elementary School filled with "Shame-Based Foods" (a phrase coined by she and her younger sister, Hannah). I'll not go into each of them, suffice it to say that Borscht is one, however. I laughed out loud, though when Rhoda writes about long-suffering complaints about her lunchpail. She notes that most children had Aquaman or Underdog on their pails. She secretly wished that a "Josie and the Pussycats lunchbox could have rescued her from the pit of uncoolness." She continues: "I figured that Josie and the Pussycats would magically make up for knee-length homemade skirts or the blonde tails braided with neurotic precision, like Heidi on crack." Instead Jantzen had to carry a navy vinyl bag with a long strap, which she asserts was a diaper bag. She claims this experience explains her interest in Prada today!

Throughout the book Jantzen shares her Mother with the reader. The New York Times Book Reviewer notes that Jantzen's mother, Mary, welcomes her divorced, broken-boned, nonreligious, academic daughter back with open arms, without judgment, castigation or undue coddling. She sings endless songs, each odder and funnier than the last, fills a freezer with mini-jars of strawberry jam to take to the elderly and suggests calmly, in line one day at Circuit City, that Janzen should marry her cousin Waldemar, who it happens is also a professor. (“Wally is my first cousin,” Janzen reminds her. “That’s both incestuous and illegal.” The women then engage in a conversation about the relative merits of marrying a pothead versus a man with a tractor.)" This is a lady I would love to meet. Shoot I'd love to taste some of her homemade jelly (in the little jars)!

I loved her response when Rhoda asked her Mother about whether she thinks it odd that her sons seem more conservative than she and Jantzen's father. Her Mom replies: "Oh, they'll mellow over time. When you're young, faith is often a matter of rules. When you should do and shouldn't do, that kind of thing. but as you get older, you realize that faith is really a matter of relationship--with God, with the people around you, with the members of your community." And to that, this reader would shout a hearty "AMEN!"

This book is by no means a "faith-based" memoir. It does not hint of Jantzen's glorious return to the faith of her father/mother. Jantzen even applied for seminary at one point in her academic career. Instead it's a gentle story of love and acceptance for her journey. She's raw. She's honest. I like that.

I love Jantzen's recollection of a phone conversation with her friend Alba shortly after her OCD husband left her. She was returning a bottle of olive oil to its place in the kitchen and had to replace it with the front facing sideways. She found herself reaching over to straighten the bottle and make it match the other bottles near it. She writes, "Personally, I didn't care whether the front of the bottle was ninety degrees skewed. It was Nick who would have cared. And Nick wasn't there. I experimentally turned the bottle sideways again, to see how it felt to defy my husband's rage for order. Then I stared at the sideways bottle in brief but silent agitation." This is when she realizes that "Fifteen years [of marriage] cannot be rotated a quarter-turn to the left, just like that."

This book is well worth the time to read it. I have to be honest, though, Jantzen uses a rich vocabulary that occasionally gave me pause. In fact, while writing this review my husband came out to see if I was "looking up word meanings." I had reported to him earlier that I felt as though there were times I needed a dictionary by my side to really read and comprehend. Despite stretching my vocabulary, this book is beautifully written, very funny, and simply enjoyable from cover to cover!

Book Review: Laughing in the Dark

Almost one month ago, I went with my friends to hear Chonda Pierce. Chonda is a Christian comedian who has shared her story in many different venues over the year. She is currently working on a project in LA where they will be putting her material on regular TV. She can make you laugh one minute and cry your eyes out the next.

While there, I was moved to pick up her book, Laughing in the Dark which recounts her breakdown and battle with depression.

I was reading along page to page thinking how cool it is that Chonda has overcome so much "junk" and that she's forward enough to share her story with others, when I was nailed between the eyes with a part that made me squirm. Really squirm.

Chonda is writing about seeing a psychiatrist to revisit her meds. She is literally in the middle of the entire diagnosis and treatment period when this happens. The doctor starts to ask her about her work schedule. Chonda tells him that she's off work right now, but mentions that she just finished an 85-city tour (in 8 months) with Women of Faith. And that she is helping care for her Mother who had just suffered a broken back. And that she is finishing up a book. And a DVD. And...and...and.

Chonda's question back to the doctor was: "Do you think I'm bipolar?" He went on to explain that she needed to strike balance especially with the "mania of her job and the reality of normal life." Balance.

Her counselor also addressed the need for balance. She told Chonda that part of her treatment is to spend about three hours a day doing nothing. Nothing. Nada. Not an email. Not a crossword puzzle. Not TV. Not cleaning. Not a phone call. Nothing.

Both the doctor and the counselor knew that Chonda needed to realize that her worth is not dependent who she is/what she does and/or the approval of those around her. I actually found myself squirming while I read this. Not that I think I am as busy as Chonda Pierce. I'm not. But I definitely wrestle with balance and those moments of sheer exhaustion. And honestly, sometimes I'm not sure I could go three minutes doing nothing--much less three hours!

I read on as Chonda peeled back the layers of her own life for her readers. I know she still struggles with the puzzle that is her life. But she also recognizes that God, himself, is the "master puzzler". And Chonda is choosing to trust him for every step she takes.

Whether you've ever dealt with depression or not, this book is a great read. Chonda's story is one of survival and victory. Hers is one of finding light in the darkness. It's one of healing. And hope. Even if you squirm while reading it...it's worth it!

Clean up at the salon...

I visited the salon today. This guy has cut my hair four times now. I like him. He's an artist. He has vision and likes to play with the hair and "create it". Today, while in the chair, he told me this story:

A new lady came in to the salon today to have him do her hair. She met him and then asked point blank, "Are you a Christian?" He said he answered "yes I am." She replied, "Good because I only give my business to Christians." Then he told me, "I would have said yes no matter what because I wanted her business." But he said, "I am a Christian of course."

Our conversation continued about how bold this woman's question was. Personally, and please don't misunderstand me here, I think it was inappropriate. While she got the answer she was looking for...it is evident from a little time in his chair (and his response to me regarding her question) that he is not likely an evangelical. I am not sure the last time he set foot in a church. Yet I suspect that these are the characteristics she was looking for.

I have to say I think this woman has it all wrong. When I consider exactly what Jesus would do and who would cut HIS hair were he looking in our city today....I suspect church attendance would not be his criteria. Nope. He'd probably be looking for the most "broken" sin-filled hair dresser in the city. (NOT that mine is...but you get my point, right?) I don't think his first question would be "Don't you want to know ME?" I am SURE it would be "Let me get to know YOU. Where you are. With nothing but grace and love."

Let me also say that I think she probably did little to further the kingdom today either. Her question became salon fodder. If it made an impact, it is a negative "who-does-she-think-she-is" one. And that breaks my heart!

One thing is for sure: there was a lot more to sweep up besides hair in that salon today.

Here's a response from my DS 2 regarding his trip:

Hey Melli and others that are curious, The Mission organization that we worked with is called Open Hearts Ministries and they have been working in the dump for around 8 years now. When they first arrived their goal was to one-by-one take these people out of the dump and set them up with a job and food on their table. A few years back they attempted to do this with a family. They took them out of the dump and got them a house and a job. This lasted all of 2 months and the family CHOSE to go back to the dump. Now, this sounds crazy. Why would anyone CHOOSE to go back to the dump? Well, there is a great sense of community there and that is what they know.

Since this, the mission organization has changed their goals a bit. The government has since decided to move the people of the dump out and to a new area of government housing. The only problem with this government housing is that they will have to pay for utilities. These people don't know how to live in anything else but the dump, so we are hoping and praying that the transition lasts and the people of the dump decide to learn how to be a working member of society.The mission organization is praying about where they fit in to this move. They are just asking God to show them where He wants them.

Like I said in my blog, there is a school in the dump that the mission group runs, but the government does not want to move the school; just the people. So, one thought is they would build another school where ever the government moves these people, but that costs money, so they are giving it to God. A lot of uncertainty about the future of the mission group is up in the air right now. They asked us to all continue to pray about where God wants them in the future as we got back to the states.

As for now, they will continue to love of these kids and build the relationships with them and their families. In the school they will continue to share the story of God and show light to these kids in a very dark place. They also have a sponsorship program with the kids in the dump. Many of the kids are sponsored, but there are still a few that are not. If you want to find out more information you can either ask me or their website is www.ohearts.org.I hope that helps!

M.

A Mission to Remember: Blog 3

This is part three of a guest blog by my DS 3. He and 21 other college students just spent their Spring Break in Nicaragua on a mission trip. This trip was certainly life-changing for them. These are his words and his account of the experience they had there.

On Thursday morning we went back to the school to say our goodbyes to the kids of La Chureca (the dump). This was full of mixed emotions. Obviously we were sad to leave the kids, but we were so happy to have had the opportunity to show these kids some joy and love. Many of the kids wrote us letters and drew us pictures as a goodbye gift.

I played soccer with my buddies that I had made throughout the past week, and we gave out the soccer balls that we brought. As we drove away from the dump for the last time, I saw it much differently as when we first arrived. I didn’t see the smoke or the cardboard houses. I didn’t see the kids with no shoes to wear or the parents sniffing glue. I saw a beautiful display of God’s Kingdom!

La Chureca is a beautiful place, and God is present there. He is doing some awesome things in the cardboard village. The dump taught us a lot about how backwards America is. Here in the states we have EVERYTHING, but lack so much in our hearts. In La Chureca, they have nothing, yet the joy is evident in their hearts! As Americans we saw that they had nothing and our hearts broke for them. We wanted to buy them gifts and give them our hats and bracelets. God really showed us that all we need on this side of heaven is Him! God will provide for all our needs if we trust in him. Not all our wants, but our needs. We quickly realized that these people don’t want gifts, they want love! And, it was awesome to shower them with love for the few days that we were there!

As our bus pulled away, we were told that we were heading to Ms. Ruby’s house. Now Ms. Ruby always prayed over every group that came to La Chureca. She prayed individually for each person in the group, and her prayers were always spot on for what each person was struggling with. They say that she “had a direct connection to God.” Unfortunately, Ms. Ruby passed away two months ago, but since then, her sister has turned the top floor of her house into a prayer room. Now, groups come up there and get prayed over by the leaders of the mission organization down there.

When we arrived and were all seated up there, they asked if anyone played guitar and could lead worship. I raised my hand, but I didn’t have my guitar with me. It was back at the compound where we were staying. As I said earlier though, God is a provider, and it just so happened that Ms. Ruby played guitar! They pulled out her bright blue guitar and handed it to me. When I held her guitar I felt an electricity coursing through my body. I started to shake and I didn’t know if I could do it. I had never led worship before, but about two months ago I began to learn to play the guitar.

I said a prayer silently while I began to strum just asking God to help me with this, and to give it all to Him. The next THREE hours are a blur to me! I just kept playing and we kept worshiping and praying over one another. It was the most amazing three hours of my life! God was with me every strum, and though my fingers were bleeding from playing so long, nothing was going to stop us from praising His name! Ms. Ruby was definitely with us in that room as I played her guitar and we prayed just as she did a few months earlier!

We began our last day by taking the kids from the orphanage on a hike. The mission group that we were working with is in the process of buying a 400 acre farm to expand their ministry. This farm is not a normal American farm. This is the most rugged terrain I have ever seen on a farm. What I thought was going to be a nice fun hike turned into carrying these young kids and attempting not to fall as I climb this mountain! Despite it being 98 degrees, we had a lot of fun hiking and eating wild fruit, and the kids loved showing us the way!

As our final day was coming to a close, we took a very scenic drive out to the beach. This was most of our first times on a Pacific beach, as well as a black sand beach. The beach was deserted and it seemed to go on forever. After taking it in for a few minutes, I grabbed the surf board and began to paddle out. The waves are much bigger than here in Florida. About 25 minutes later I met my buddy out there and we had a blast. The waves weren’t perfect, but they were a lot of fun! As the sun went down, our group took our last group photo and headed back home. God painted such a beautiful sunset for us to see that night.


As I was writing this all the feelings, sounds, smells and tastes came back to me. It was cool to re-live my week in Nicaragua. Now there are many more stories that I could tell, but this will give you guys a good idea of what we did and a few stories to go along with it. I look forward to telling stories of Nicaragua for many years to come. Nicaragua definitely has a piece of my heart. I learned so many things while I was over there, and I pray that God gives me the opportunities to share my stories back in the states. We went there with the mindset that we were there to bless them, but I believe that we came back just as blessed. La Chureca is a beautiful place and I thank God for giving us the opportunity to go to Nicaragua and bring joy to his beautiful little angels!

Guest Blog: A Mission to Remember Post 2

Our group continued doing this same routine for the first three days. The only thing that changed was in the afternoon we took a group of kids on a field trip. These kids rarely leave the dump, let alone the city, so it was awesome to see these kids in awe of the simple things that we take for granted like tall buildings and fast food buildings. The first day we took the second graders to a lookout with a breath taking view of a volcano! We let the kids take a horseback ride down the mountain which cost us about 25 cents each kid!


One of the little girls in the second grade named Alix heard the live music playing not too far away and asked if she could go dance. I of course said yes, so I walked her over and watched her dance for a minute. I quickly noticed what dance she was doing. The Meringue! I then asked her if I could dance with her, and she said yes. That was really something to dance with this beautiful girl from the dump!

The second day we took the third graders on a field trip to Granada. This was the furthest we took any of the groups. It was just under a two hour BUMPY bus ride away! But, again, the kids enjoyed getting out of the dump for a few hours. In Granada we took the kids on an hour boat tour around the 200 islands that formed from the volcano many years ago. The sights on that tour were breath taking. We came up to one island to get a closer look at the monkeys that were on the island. Little did I know that “closer look” meant that we hold food out for these monkeys and they come onto the boat! It was very neat and the kids loved the monos (monkeys)! On the third day, we took the fourth grade class to the zoo. Now, this was no zoo like you might be imagining. This zoo had a cage for squirrels and a cage for a raccoon! It was amusing to see some of our everyday animals on display, but they also had lions and tigers (and bears oh my)! Before we were let loose with the kids, we were instructed to keep the kids close to us because they could get bit. I didn’t quite know what they meant by this because I assumed these animals weren’t just roaming the place. I assumed they were in cages…big mistake! Many of the animals run wild through the “zoo.” So I would call it more of a walk through the jungle with a few animals in some cages! And, the animals that were in cages were within arm’s reach. I could easily have touched a lion right on the nose! Luckily, no kids, or college students, got hurt!

Guest Blog: A Mission to Remember

Following is excerpt one from my DS 2's recent mission trip to Nicaragua with his church in Gainesville. When I asked him to guest blog, he agreed quickly. When he wrote his words, he said he just wrote and wrote and before he knew it, he was at 2500 words! I've decided to break it up into several segments.

Here's the first one:

On Saturday, March 6th, our group arrived in Nicaragua around 10:30pm. Although it was dark, we could tell that the place that we were staying was very nice. We called it the Garden of Eden. It had a ton of hammocks and palm trees and a monkey. This was a place that people would pay to come on their honeymoon. Our college pastor told us that this place was a lot nicer than he normally takes groups to, but the conditions that we were about to work in were a lot worse than he usually takes groups to. Now, I have been on previous mission trips, but nothing that I had seen or heard could have prepared me for what I was about to see. I knew that we were going to work with the people who lived in the dump, but I had no clue what that meant. I though it meant that people lived around the dump and used the dump as their resources. Boy was I wrong!

These groups of nearly 1000 people, who live in La Chureca, or the city dump, live smack in the center of the dump. These families thrive off of what they find in the city landfill. These people literally run after the dump trucks as they come into the dump and they fight over the trash that is dumped. Each of these families needs to survive and they do so by finding leftover food in the dump and selling bottles that are brought in by the dump trucks.

On the first day of the trip we went to a church that was in the city of Managua, Nicaragua. This church was very different than your normal American church, but it was neat to see how they worshiped. No one was holding back or worried about how their friends viewed them. Everyone was very authentic and worshiped as they pleased.

After the church service we went to the dump for the first time. We were instructed to be silent as we toured the dump and to just take it in silently. This was very difficult for our group. We had never seen anything like this. We had never seen such poverty and despair.

These people literally lived in cardboard houses (shown on the right in the photo above). Raw sewage was running right through the middle of the place we were walking. Many of us were filled with guilt and did not know how we could do anything that would impact these children and families. I mean how are we supposed to tell these kids about a heavenly father who loves them when their earthly father sold them for the rights to an area of trash to dig through? This kind of stuff happens daily in this area. Girls are sold every day for the rights to a piece of the dump.

When we got back to the compound where we were staying, I took my guitar up to the third deck look out and began to play Chris Tomlin’s “God of this City.” This song has never spoken to me as much as it did that night. As I was singing the lyrics I had a peace come over me because I knew that He was not just the God of my city, but He is the God of La Chureca too!

The second day we realized that we are supposed to be the seed that God can water and grow for his kingdom. We were not called to Nicaragua to save these kids and bring them back to the US. We were called to plant the seed and let God do the rest.

We arrived at the school in the dump on Monday and all of our plans went down the drain. We had plans to do a VBS sort of thing, but our plans were thrown down the drain. We began to improvise and just play with the kids. I picked up a soccer ball and began a soccer game in the school yard. I thank God for our plans not working! We had an amazing time just building relationships with these children, and showing them God’s love.

In the afternoon the girls of our group put on a spa day for the girls in the dump.

They painted their fingernails and toenails, and did some face painting as well. While the girls did this, I was in charge of running a soccer camp for the boys of the dump. Now, let me describe the scenery for a second. Remember we are still IN the dump.

The smoke from the burning trash is so thick it is very difficult to breathe or even open your eyes all the way. The smell never goes away, and because it has not rained for FOUR months and won’t rain again until MAY, the dust is very dry and blows in your face constantly! This “field” that we were playing on was a very hard surface with tons of dust and dirt on top. Even though we could barely open our eyes and we were slipping all over the place, we had a great time playing with the kids. I love how soccer is a universal language. I didn’t know everything they were saying because they spoke Spanish, but we didn’t have to. I set the ball down, blew the whistle, and we played!

From Susan: If you have specific questions or comments for DS 2, let me know. He says he could go "on and on" telling stories. I'm sure he'd be happy to expand and/or expound on any portion of their trip or his blog about it. And a big thanks to the girls on the team who took these photos!

Becoming a Mountainclimber

I LOVE the MOUNTAINS! I always have. When I was a little girl, I used to dream of one day living on Walton's mountain. When I am surrounded by them, I find that I am more calm. Relaxed. Settled. Except when they are "life mountains".

We all have them. Some are large and others are smaller and more "foothill-like". Life mountains are those problems and situations that arise that seem huge and at times, insurmountable. This morning it occurred to me that as much as I LOVE the physical mountains, there are times I long for only a flat ground of faith upon which to walk. Then the question came to me, "How much faith does that take?" The truth is, the answer is a weak, "Not much!"

"If you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.” (Matthew 17:20)

While it's nice to think that they all would just move out of the way with the exercise of a little faith, they don't always. Instead, step-by-step and inch-by-inch, we have to climb them. Conquer them!

I'm at the base of a mountain. I cannot see the climb, the peak, or the other side. But I am sure that there are blessings on it.

I am reminded of a conversation I had with my DS 3 when he was only 4 years old and preparing to go to Kindergarten. With tears in his eyes, he said he didn't want to go to Kindergarten. I asked why. His answer shocked me, "Because I might have to go to fifth grade!" What!?! Fifth grade??? What did THAT have to do with going to Kindergarten? He soon told me, "You have to get shots when you go to fifth grade!" He was looking at the entire mountain and figured if he never took the first step, he wouldn't have to take the 101st step.

We all do it. We all stare up at our life mountains at times and cry out to God, "I don't WANT to go!" But he gently nudges us to take the first step...and the next...and the next and the next. Because he's there the whole time.

Today I'm choosing to climb the mountain WITH faith! Here are the promises I am taking with me on my journey:

Nahum 1:7
The LORD is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in him.

2 Corinthians 4:8
We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair.

Psalm 138:7
Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life; you stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes, with your right hand you save me.

Isaiah 43:2
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.

1 Peter 5:7
Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

{If you're here to see Random Dozen--scroll past this post.}

Today I heard this song.



It's not the first time. In fact, I've known this song since my college days when it was first performed by Benny Hester. I bought the album (in vinyl) because the song spoke to me so much.

The story is timeless. It is the story of The Prodigal's Son (from Luke 15:11-32). The boy gets his inheritance early...squanders it...comes home ready to be a slave on his father's farm...then finds that his father is actually waiting on him by the road and runs out to meet him. Then his father throws a huge "welcome home" party. It's timeless in so many ways. Like the song, I've heard it a hundred times from a hundred angles. But today it spoke to me in a fresh way.

It occurred to me that we generally think of the prodigal as being away for months or even years. And I really think that's pretty clear from Jesus' words that the young man was gone for a while.

But today, as I drove down the street, singing the familiar refrain: "And then he ran to me, took me in his arms, held my head to his chest, said my son has come home again..." I thought about the times in my life when I've had "Prodigal Moments." I'm sure that every single time I've strayed in my walk, God still runs out to meet me when I return to him.

Every. Single. Time.

Then I thought how many times I've had those "Prodigal Moments" and how many times God was waiting with arms wide open.

And I was humbled.

Deeply.

A WHY?? and a WOW!!

DS 4 is officially in the tween years. He turned 11 a few weeks ago. I have to say that these years (between 10 and 14) have not been my favorites for any of the guys. It's such a time of transition for them. I've been thinking a lot about how each of the first three navigated these waters and praying especially for DS 4 as he takes his turn. And, of course, it makes me reflective!

Today I was at the store with him. He was spending his birthday money from his grandparents. While there, he wanted something and I said "no". He's definitely mastered the art of trying to persuade. In fact, I was thinking today that this skill should serve him well on our state writing exam in the 8th grade where he'll likely have to write a persuasive essay. Still, like most of us, his list of "reasons" can often sound like whining.

Like any younger sibling, they LOVE to throw the "But so-and-so got such-and-such and you didn't say no..." While listening to it (and practicing the art of not feuling it) I saw a young Mother stroll by with three kids in the cart. The one in the front looked to be an older toddler or even young preK child. He had a HUGE pacifier sticking out of his mouth. I confess my FIRST thought was "Wow, he seems to be a bit old for THAT!" Followed quickly by this thought, "Why don't they make a pacifier for the tween set?" At least I might be able to elicit a little peace and quiet when it's needed.

Honestly, right after that I could only imagine how many times someone might like to have one for ME! I am sure there's times the boys would like for me to just be quiet. And likewise I'm sure DH has had that thought a time or three or four! Add to that my friends, my extended family, my colleagues and God. While I try not to do it often...I know that we all have our "whiny moments" when we are behaving like the child we used to be---pleading to have things just our way.

I prayed then that God would help me recognize it when it rises in me. I also whispered a prayer of thanks that my kids really ARE past that age. I know that no age or stage lasts forever---thank goodness!

And in the WoW! department.

While we were out shopping, I took back an iPod player that I purchased a few weeks ago back to Target. Here's the deal...I couldn't find the receipt. I didn't have the box, the instruction manual...or anything else but the player and the little things that came with it. It seemed to be working fine on all accounts BUT when you put the iPod in it, nothing comes out. Soooo...I went with the purpose of having someone help me with it or calling the company so I could figure it out.

I didn't even KNOW which credit card I used!

I packed up all the pieces I did have in a pampered chef box and took it to customer service. The lady at the counter said, "You need to go back to electronics and find the exact model and then I can look it up on one of your cards." DS 4 and I found it on display, but no boxes. The girl back there wrote all pertinent information down for me. We picked out an alternate model and returned to the front desk.

I gave the lady the number and she found it in about two seconds flat! She scanned the new machine and I was out the door in about 15 minutes total! Not ONE question asked. AMAZING!

Soooo....there ya' go a WHY? and a WOW! from my neck of the woods! Happy Saturday!

Music touches souls deeply. For me, the "right song" can be a balm when I'm weary.
This particular song, "What Faith Can Do" by Kutless, has soothed my soul on more than one occasion in the past few weeks. It seems it will play at just the right moment. For me, it's almost as if God himself is saying, "Hold on. I've got your back. I know you. I love you. I didn't promise no bumps in the road. I DID promise to be with you always. Have faith."

I've decided to share it here today. Enjoy! And, if your soul is in need, may you find comfort in these words:

To and Through

Three times in a week recently, I saw this quote: "If God brings you to it, He'll bring you through it." I understand it and to some degree, agree. But I also have to say that sometimes it's not "God bringing me TO" anything. In fact, it's me getting my own self into pickles that I simply should have avoided. Still, I know He loves me enough to help me out even when I get my own self in a mess. And the fact is, He is with me the entire time I'm choosing the wrong path or when I unknowingly veer off course. I may not come out unscarred or without bruises...but I'll come out. And that's a promise for us all!

I love that!

Flushing it out...

As I indicated in my last post, I've been in somewhat of a funk lately. Again I want to reiterate that I know that my "issues" pale in comparison to the plight of so many people in the world. Still it's been a rough few weeks. I'm emotionally drained.

Some of you know that I work on our church's Servant Evangelism team. This means that we go out into the community to spread random acts of service and kindness in the name of Jesus. We have done many many different types of outreach here in our community. Saturday, though, was by far the most unique!
After reading about this in Steve Sjogren's book 101 Ways to Reach Your Community, our team decided we wanted to give a "toilet bowl outreach" a try. Yes, you read that right.

Here's the gist of it: You go into a business in the community and tell the employees that you'd like to give them a break today and help out by scrubbing the toilets. Of course, as you might expect, some people say yes and others say no. You NEVER do this AFTER visiting the bathroom first. But you always let the people know that it's our way of saying, "God loves you" and taking an often unwanted task off their hands.

A few weeks ago, at our planning meeting, I thought "yeah, I'm ready for this. Should be a great experience and totally unexpected." Honestly, this morning it was the LEAST and LAST thing that I wanted to do--with the exception of, perhaps, a root canal. I even conjured up excuses to let the participants know that I had to back out.

So, with my van filled with cleaning supplies, I headed off to meet the team. While driving to church, the clash of thoughts were swirling around my head: "I could just bow out. I mean I HAVE purchased all the things and set the teams up for success." "I could tell them that I'll pray for them."

THEN a still small voice whispered "If you want to be great in God's kingdom, SERVE." AND "The best way to get above your circumstance is to bend down and help someone else."

The "Set the example and get out of your comfort zone and beyond yourself" argument won. When I arrived, the team was smaller than expected. A team of four of us set out to local gas stations, convenience stores, and drug stores. What happened next was simply amazing!

Our team had two men and two women. When we asked the managers of the stores if we could give them a break, they were nothing short of blown away! Even those people who said, "No." were quite amazed and glad for the offer. One manager said, "That might be the oddest request I've ever had." Then he said, "Sure...if you want to clean 'em, go ahead."

At least a few times, we were able to tell people waiting on and/or visitng the restrooms what we were doing and why. Even THEY were surprised by this random act of kindness.

After spending a little more than an hour out in the community cleaning, we wrapped up. And, again, I was reminded the joy that comes in service. It's a pleasure to put a smile on people's faces. It's immeasurable in so many ways. We never know when our act of kindness might plant a seed that will grow into full-blown faith for another.

Sjogren says this is his favorite SE activity. He also says that this is the "most rejected" activity they do...yet, because of it's impact they do it again and again.

For me it was SO WORTH IT! My negative spirit was quickly flushed away. And all it took was a few toilet brushes, rags, and cleaners---oh, and a willing spirit!

Keep Christ Where?

I was the first car at the red light. Right behind me were about 6 - 7 more cars waiting to move on to whatever their destination. My son called me while I was sitting there. I answered. (I don't even WANT to hear about talking on the phone and driving.)

While talking to him, the light turned green. I hit the gas. Apparently, it was too slow for the cranky gentleman in the car behind me. He and a woman were riding in the car together. He LAYED on the horn. I thought, "Certainly he's not honking at me! I am moving forward. What ELSE could he want?" As soon as we were safely across the intersection, he went to the lane beside me and gave me a gesture or two while obviously screaming at me as if I could hear him.

It was a sight to see.

But, even more of a sight was what was stuck to the back of his luxury vehicle. Not one, but TWO of these signs:

There was one stuck over each of the back lights so you could see it no matter which side of his car you were on. Two! And, in my not-so-angelic thoughts I said, "Yeah buddy, you SHOULD keep Christ in Christmas!"

That was two days ago.

This morning I ran out to finish up some of the school's holiday shopping for needy kids. I drove around the parking lot a couple of times and spotted a lady pulling out of a front space. I looked around to be sure no more cars were waiting. None. I put my blinker on. She saw me.

Just as the driver pulled out, a lady in a red truck sped around from an aisle over and went in the space. I layed on horn. I pointed to my blinker. I hollered as if she could hear me. She looked at me and hollered back saying, "I was over there!" (I am a pretty good lip reader.) So I said, "I was RIGHT HERE!" She didn't care. She parked. I drove away to find another space.

Then, right there in the parking lot, I had to thank God that I didn't have a "Keep Christ in Christmas" sticker on MY car! Even though I didn't gesture rudely to her. I was obviously MAD. She knew it. There was no way to hide it.

So, I think maybe we should consider a new bumper sticker: "Keep Christ in your CAR!" I know. I know. You can't put him in your car anymore than you can pin down a cloud...but I'm sure you get my drift. The fact of the matter is...he's there. Shoot, he's EVERYWHERE. And we all need to be mindful of it. So maybe I'll change my sticker to just say: "Keep Christ"!

Happy Tuesday!