Time changes things. It does, doesn’t it? Sometimes the change is good. And sometimes it’s not. I’ve noticed changes recently that have me thinking.
Let me start by giving a bit of my background.
I was raised in the church; it is a mainline denomination that has had its moments of sheer liberalism. Yet, at its roots, the church was founded on John Wesley’s teachings which are heavily “laced with grace”. It was where I first told someone that I wanted to “give my heart to Jesus.” Ultimately, that same denomination is where DH ended up in ministry.
When I left for college, my home church was in a stage of “country club” type living. It was a “whatever you choose is OK for you” mentality. In fact, I remember the pastor telling us that the Bible was “just a piece of literature”. And, “you can’t take it literally.” I was disillusioned at best and wanted something more.
As a college freshman, I found myself surrounded by people who were really “sold out” for Jesus. They went to different churches, but they shared an amazing faith. I went a few times and soon found myself “recommitting my life” to the promise I’d made earlier. And I began soaking up the Bible, regular teachings about faith, and Christian music. Again, I see this time as such an important fiber of the tapestry that is my life.
But I also developed a large list of “do’s” and “don’ts” of Christian Living. I’m sure there is no need to repeat them. Because I know many of us have them memorized whether we agree with them or not.
Recently I’ve noticed that the lines in the sand that were drawn for me by those do’s and don’ts seem blurry. There are things that are “acceptable” in today’s culture and churches that simply wouldn’t have happened 20+ years ago (in some cases, even in the most liberal of places). And when I see such things, sometimes I wonder: “Hmmm..THAT’S OK? I thought I was supposed to feel guilty if I did ____________ or said ____________ or went __________________.”
Here are some of those things that have given me pause in recent years:
I would never have thought about having a glass of wine in those early years. And if I did, I’d be guilty for days. I don’t share that opinion anymore. Back then, I would never expect to hear a Christian cuss. And if I slipped…GUILT. Not that I’m saying it’s OK to be a total trash mouth…but I do know people that DO speak the occasional word, as have I (NOT God's name in vane), and none have been zapped by holy lightning bolts. I listen to a mix of music, back then many Christians who would only listen to Christian music. When I hear a Christian DJ or musician talk about mainstream and secular music, or they are watching some show on TV, it sometimes makes me stop and think, “Really HE listens to THAT? OR SHE watches THAT?” The other day, one of our radio DJs twittered about playing Texas Hold ‘Em with his son. He could have been shunned from Christian media not so long ago. And though some seem petty, the list goes on.
Over the years, I’ve learned to relax myself. I am not as quick to judge as I think I was in those early years. I have learned and experienced more about grace than I ever imagined. I know there were many times when I didn’t accept it or extend it early on in my walk.
I never want to be a “prude” and I don’t want to be such a hard line Christian that I cannot accept a different opinion or spin on something. I DO believe that what is acceptable for one person may not be for another. I also want to avoid being the “line in the sand” type that Melli discussed in her post yesterday.
I know the world is different. I know culture shifts things. I know things are not always black and white. And I'm glad. But, I'm curious, does anyone else sense these (or similar) changes? And, if you do, are they positive? Or not?
Cause I'm still making up my mind!
7 comments:
Wellllll... I know a LOT of Christians that do not drink - not wine, not beer, not a friendly margarita before dinner... nothing. BUT... I don't know where that comes from? Jesus drank wine on a regular basis and enjoyed it! Enough so that the Blessed Mother asked him to MAKE MORE when his "time had not yet come"! I do know we are commanded not to get DRUNK. Having a glass of wine, and getting DRUNK are two different things. My own Pastor and his wife both partake of a drink here and there... so I'm doubting that there is anything forbidding it. Everything in MODERATION, me thinks!
I have the SAME feelings on gambling. I don't think an occasional game of penny ante poker is going to send you straight to hell in a handbasket... Nor do I think visiting a casino as part of a planned vacation that you have saved to gamble X amount of dollars will either! I do think that gambling away your families income and being unable to pay the bills is another story! There is a difference between gambling, and being a gambler. Self control is the key.
As for cussing... I think it's wrong. The words that are considered to be cuss words have changed over the years -- plenty since biblical times... but the idea behind them has not. I'm not a holy roller - I slip and say a thing or two here and there too... but it's most often followed by an immediate apology to God. Because they slip! Now... where I think confusion arises is in "Oh MY!" "Oh Gosh!" "Oh Dear" ... the phrases that some religions preach are not to be used because you're just replacing using God's name in vane with another word. But if it never OCCURED to me to say "Oh God!" then I don't believe that's what I've done. Why can't "Oh my!" or "Oh goodness!" mean just that? And we alllllll know I use those phrases a b'zillion times a day! I've talked to God about them, and thus far He has NOT convicted me on them... does that mean I'm right? I have NO idea! I do know when I'm wrong He usually finds a way to let me know it!!! Might be that just hasn't been at the top of his priority list for ME yet... He has OTHER things He's workin' on with ME right now! Maybe what right and wrong is based on what level you're at in your Christianity??? I dunno.
Guess I haven't helped much, huh?
Susan - this is not a new problem in the church! Paul talks about how some folks were eating meat, and others weren't and there was a big fuss. Is it okay to eat the meat? Paul said if you think it a sin, don't eat it, and if you dont' think it is a sin, then eat it, but don't make your brother eat it.
I believe many things fall in this category, like alcohol. Taking the Lord's name in vain is breaking a commandment and thereby was wrong, is wrong and will never cease to be wrong.
Saved by grace. I am a big rule follower and have often looked at others and thought "OH!" But I realize I probably have a plank in my own eye, so why am I judging someone else's speck.
Your words today were really good, and I have wrestled with them myself. Following Christ is a journey, not a destination. We're all at different places on the road, but we all have dusty feet.
Have a great day!
I always say...it's not for us to judge...God knows their hearts and ours and that's all that matters ;)
But you are correct....I have only learned this now that I am older ;)
I think there are some things that are black and white ("abomination" is a big clue), and some that are gray, and that if you walk in step with the Spirit, He'll let you know when the gray is black for you. You have to be in tune with the still, small voice that says, "Hey, this is not what I want for you. Don't worry about others; this is what I'm saying to you personally." I think we just need to remember that methods and mediums of worship and living our lives change, but the message doesn't change. And that "Message" is the biggest stumbling block for people all over the world. I don't care so much what people do/don't do, as much as who Jesus is to them and how He makes a difference in their lives. And it's not like I'm pinning people against walls to tell me anything, I'm just talking about between them and God. Does that make sense?
I agree with Linda...sometimes God tells us individually to abstain from something or to do something. And sometimes He tells us all quite clearly that something is right or wrong- and that goes for all of us!
Your topic brings me to something I just overheard this past week. Something I really didn't want to broadcast on a blog post, but I'll mention it here in a comment...I was walking into the church where I was to pick up my girls from their Missionette meeting. (Not our home church, but we're still active through this club and choir there)
Thankfully, I didn't have my girls with me yet, because some jr, high kids were walking through the parking lot, apparently just out of their youth group meeting. Apparently they were all being silly and joking, and the boy was calling the girls "boys"...and one of the girls laughed and said, no she wasn't, she had the b--bs to prove it!
I coudn't hear what the reply was, but then she added with a laugh...
"Because I wear the lowest cut shirts in the church!"
OK, I know these were jr. high kids and I know what a mixed up time this is...but the fact that that they were all talking loudly while grown ups were trickling through the parking lot was not only shocking to me, but gave me a troubled feeling inside.
Obviously, this particular girl has some issues, probably goes to church because her parents make her, and has a misguided sense of self worth - as well no sense of modesty.
There's a lost virtue right there...modesty.
But truly, the media and the current low cleavage styles have promoted the idea that "if you have it, flaunt it", so that even new anchors and tv hosts show almost everything.
I'm not a prude either...I like to dress cute when I can, and be at least semi- in style, but at the same time, I try to value modesty...and hopefully, I'm instilling this in my two daughters as well.
Wow...this was long! See what happens when you open up topics like this! ;)
That was an interesting post!!! I try not getting "caught up" in all the do's & don'ts" Believe me my earliest Chrisitian training was along those lines, even not wearing "slacks" etc. I think it must grieve the Master's heart that we let such things become stumbling blocks to loving one another, and especially loving HIM.
Susan
Hi Susan! You know I'm working on this myself. Like CK I am also a rule follower and I find myself having to pay close attention so as not to put the law in front of grace. At the same time, I fully believe that far too many Christians don't take obedience to Christ seriously encough due to "abounding in grace". The Bible speaks to both sides of this matter. I think that we need to be always checking ourselves to be sure we are maintaing the proper balance. Now I think I feel a post forming.
I love this post and everyone here had some very good thoughts on the matter.
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