Thirteen L words that describe Susan:

1. Laughter - I love to laugh and have a good time!

2. Loyal - I am a very loyal person. When I've made a dear friend, that person is my "friend for life".

3. Lists - This is not something that I do well. I actually can make the list...but then I LOSE it!!

4. Listener - I have been told that I am a good listener.

5. Lexington - My husband and I lived near and worked in Lexington, KY our first years of marriage. This was a very special time for us. It is still one of my favorite places to visit.

6. Lion - I have always loved this animal. I do NOT believe in it, but it is my "birth sign" and it was the mascot of my high school.

7. Leader - I am a leader. I tend to take leadership roles when I am involved in an organization. It's been interesting being in the church for over a year and simple "being". Now, I am ready to step back into a leadership role. I think it's where I'm "supposed" to be.

8. Learner - Above all else, I am this.

9. Legumes - Ewwww...don't really like 'em! I HAVE learned to eat green beans when they are cooked "right" though.

10. Leisure - I am not good with leisure time. My friends at work tell me that I have little people in my head that never stop thinking. They're kind of right. BUT I am learning to stop and enjoy some moments of sheer relaxation.

11. Lenses - I wear glasses. I did not get them until I was 28 and then I had to get BIFOCALS! Talk about a slap! And thank goodness for progressive lenses.

12. Log Cabin - I dream of living in one with a BIG wrap around porch in the mountains.

13. Love - This is most important for last. I am blessed to love and to be loved!

Labels: All About Me, Thursday Thirteen

It’s not uncommon to hear those who have lost a limb talk about phantom pain. This is that sensation that the limb is actually there and a part of the person. It’s even been reported that amputees often feel tingling, itching and other sensations from missing limbs. There is a body of research out there that indicates that this is not always “in the head”…but that there may be some physiological reasons for it.

I don’t know about you, but I think sometimes I assume “Phantom Emotions”. They, for me, are those times when I see or hear someone else going through something and automatically assume that I “might” have to deal with the same thing someday. Quite honestly, I think it’s WRONG. The Bible tells us that we are not to worry or be anxious. I know God has the number of hairs on my head counted out. He has a plan for me. He knows my thoughts, my fears and my dreams. And He loves me. Yet there are those moments when I find myself wrestling with “self” as I panic and worry without a real cause—it’s a type of “Phantom Anxiety”. It happens almost without warning when I hear of the tragedies of others.

Today is one of those days for me.

I woke up this morning to hear the radio announcer tell the listeners that we need to be praying for a local pastor and his family. The Pastor, it seems, went to visit his Mother for Mother’s Day in North Carolina. Then, he and his 13 year old son left early Monday morning in their small plane to head to Arkansas and pick up a friend on their way to Texas for a Conference. The person in Arkansas reported that they “never showed up” and thus the search and rescue started yesterday afternoon. Today, they found the wreckage of the plane and the bodies of the pastor and his son.

My heart breaks for the wife and mother that is left behind. She has lost one of her six children and her soul mate. I can only picture what five sisters and brothers must be asking today, “Why?”

And while I pray earnestly for her comfort and peace during this most difficult time, I confess that I tend to heap the “what if’s” into my thought life during this type of thing. It doesn’t take long until I am wallowing in a load of anxiety about my own husband and children.

This happens for me when the tragedy is something that I know could have just as easily happened to me or my own family. It surfaces when a young person is tragically injured or dies in a car crash, when a small child drowns in a pool, or when someone is severely mistreated by another. It happens when I hear about a bank robbery, a parade mishap, or a senseless act of violence. When I really dig down to find out WHY it happens, I realize that it is about control.

I know that I am not in control. I also know that sometimes awful things DO happen in our world to some really good people. While I try to cast my worry aside, it’s often easier said than done. But worry helps no one. It cannot add a minute to my life or yours.

So I must find a way to guard my heart from the speculation game and what-if’s that plague me. I must find a way to trust. And rest. And know that He IS God who can and will take away my phantom anxiety!

I cannot believe that I am the only woman who deals with worry. In fact, I would guess that most of us have experienced this to one degree or another in our lives. I don’t know of an instant remedy, but I DO know that Christians can rest in God’s promises. Because step by step and inch by inch I know I can be better today than I was yesterday. Today I choose to rest and reflect on scripture:

One I found on the church’s website: For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39

And the other is simply an “old favorite” for me: Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus Philippians 4:5-6

And such truth is not phantom at all!

Labels: All About Me, Lessons, ponderings, Prayer Requests

A few moments ago, DS 3 (laptop in his lap) sternly called, "MOM!" I said, "What?" He answered with one word: "BLOG!"


I'm no fool. When your children are telling you "it's time"...then it MUST be time!


As I noted last week, I was at the International Reading Association Conference in Atlanta. It's one of my favorite times of the year as it allows me to connect with people that I mostly "see" only via a laptop. My friends, Suzi and Kristin, and I spoke on Wednesday. We signed books on Thursday. It is great fun hearing feedback from other educators.

The boys seemed to do pretty well while I was gone (DH was out too). My in-laws blessed us by caring for DS 4. The other boys stayed here at home. It's still hard for me to recognize that this is "OK". I am sure this has caused them to roll their eyes on more than one occasion...I mean DS 1 will be 20 in a few days and DS 2 is almost 19. I guess once you're a Mother, you're always a Mother.

Speaking of Mother...I had a lovely day with my DSs 2, 3, and 4 and my own Mom in Tampa for Mother's Day. We are blessed for sure.

Now we are in the "wind-down" for senior year. Prom is this weekend. I am having 20 seniors here for dinner just prior to the prom on Saturday. That's only after I host my friend Sandy's daughter's bridal shower here that morning. Are we NUTS or what???

I hope you have had a lovely week. I've missed you. It will take me a few days to catch up with all of your blogs. But I'll be around when I can.

I'm not online much this week because I am in Atlanta at our International Reading Conference. Everyone have a great week and I'll check in when I can...

First off, in regards to my last post, I DO have a cell phone charger. It wasn't working yesterday because I was in DS 1's car where the fuse blew. I'm happy to report my cell phone is making its way back to normal today--since I am in my own car that has a working plug.

Now, my post on Monday apparently sent a few of my family members into a bit of a flurry of wonder. In that post, I noted:

In the meantime, there are some big decisions being made here in our house
that I cannot discuss here yet. It's nothing "bad"...only a change in direction.
Please pray for our family as we help work through what steps to take in the
next few weeks.

I received several phone calls asking if everything was OK. And the answer is "Yes"! We are not sick, pregnant, or moving! Trust me, if any of those things were happening, I'd have said a lot more in my initial post! In fact, if either of the latter two were true, I probably would have been announcing my new "straight jacket" apparel! ;-)

In some ways, it feels a bit anti-climatic to share it...but here goes (with my DS 2's permission):

M came to us on Sunday evening at 10pm (gotta love the times they pick, don't you?) and said he needed to talk to us. My heart went back to normal when he told us that he was a bit unsettled about his decision to go to school in MI. He said, and I quote, "The two most important things to me are family and friends. I don't know WHY I'd move 1500 miles away from those." He had been praying and seeking direction and determined that he wanted to stay in Florida for school.

Of course, we were shocked, mainly because six months ago there were "no good schools in Florida!" (Sorry, son, I'm the Mom, and I had to get that one in!) And because of this former opinion, he had not applied anywhere else EXCEPT the one school in Michigan! Timing is sometimes everything...because the school formerly known as "U Can't Finish" (which is here in the Sunshine State)---but now being acknowledged with the rest of the collegiate world, as "UCF," was still accepting applications. We submitted Monday night.

In another turn of events, DS 1 has not been able to ship out and may not be able to go for quite some time. So, he has decided that he also will apply at "U CAN Finish" I mean UCF and perhaps go live with his brother. In one fell swoop I was taken back to a time when they were much younger, and sharing a room, and DS 2 announced, "I'm going to have to go to college with D, because we've never been apart." And pretty much he was (and is) right. They have been "friends" since we first brought DS 1 into the hospital to meet his brother.

Now, before I go all sappy and sentimental on you, let me say thank you for your prayers. I am thankful that we have such a fantastic family and so many supportive friends both IRL and here in blog world. Mostly I am so proud of "my guys" who are growing into such well-rounded and thoughtful human beings. I appreciate your continued prayers as they both seek out the next steps in their journey and we seek to provide guidance and wisdom.

Now everyone continue what you were doing....

Labels: All About Me, family, Prayer Requests, School

I have LeeAnn Rimes in my head today:

How do I get through one night without you
If I had to live without you
What kind of life would that be
Oh I, I need you in my arms Need you to hold
You're my world, my heart, my soul
If you ever leave
Baby you would take away everything good in my life
And tell me now

How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive
How do I How do I Oh, how do I live

She's been there since yesterday afternoon when I discovered that my cell phone was dead as a doornail, finished, kaput! Of course, I NEEDED it at that moment.

I was heading out to a meeting at a place I'd never been before. I printed out the directions from email just before I left work. The closer I got to my destination I began looking for the directions. I soon realized they were ON MY DESK. At work!

It's natural then to pick up the cell phone, admit to one of the sons that I'm a ditz sometimes and ask them to look in my email for the directions. But, said cell phone was out of juice.

I drove into the subdivision where I was supposed to be. I remembered the number to open the gate, but not the house number. I thought perhaps if I drove down the street I'd be "led" to the right house. But...NOTHING. And I really didn't want to do a door to door scavenger hunt to find the right place.

So, I headed out to find a pay phone. I can't remember the last time I looked for one. And quite honestly I was thinking the only place I might find one is in an antique shop! Suddenly, I saw it on the side of the local drug store. I got out with TWO quarters just in case the FIRST one didn't work. I mean my Mother did teach me to be prepared!

I walked up to that antiquated piece of technology and put in my quarter and dialed only to be met on the other end with a voice that said, "Please deposit twenty-five cents." I told my computer phone-a-friend that I DID put in twenty-five cents...but went ahead and threw the other quarter in for good measure. That's when I saw that the cost for a local call is now FIFTY cents! I found myself longing for my childhood when this would have cost me a DIME!

Even after receiving the other quarter, the computer continued her mantra, "Please deposit twenty-five cents." I hit the coin return. Got both quarters out and tried again. She just kept talking to me.

Frustrated and now 30 minutes LATE for my meeting, I went into the drugstore and asked for a phone book. I guess THAT also belongs in the antique store, because there wasn't one to be found. The nice lady at the photo desk, though, let me call home to ask for help. I think she wanted to see me admit to my teenage son that I AM a ditz!

DS 2 came through for me and found the address. And all the way back to the house, I found myself eyeing my dead cell phone and singing: "How DO I live without you? I want to know. How do I BREATHE without you? If you ever go. How do I e-ver, e-ver SURVIVE? How do I..How do I...oh how do I BREATHE?"

Labels: All About Me, Lessons, ponderings

Thirteen K words that describe Susan:

1. Kids - I've got 4 of 'em. I teach 'em everyday. I LOVE 'em! It seems that kids have been a part of my life since I was--well--a KID!

2. Kiss - I love 'em too!

3. Kaleidoscope - I love looking through a kaleidoscope. I think it pretty much describes my life. Multi-faceted and ever-changing and pretty colorful.

4. Kansas - I've never been there, but it makes me think of the Wizard of Oz which is one of my favorite movies. I've been known to tell people, "You're not in Kansas anymore."

5. Kairos - This is a greek word for a very special moment in time. It is the "right or opportune moment". I can honestly say I've had several "kairos" moments in my life. And I'm blessed for each one.

6. Karaoke - I love to go to karaoke! It's so much fun to listen and sing along. I've been known to karaoke with my colleagues until the wee hours of the morning!

7. Kashi - This is a cereal that I like, but I don't eat enough.

8. Kentucky - My very favorite place that DH and I have lived. It is the perfect mix of seasons. People are beyond friendly. My DS 1 was born there. It represents, for me, a very special time in my life.

9. Keeled - I know this is a strange word, but it makes me think of those who are "even-keeled". I'm not always so good at this, but I try.

10. Keepers - This is the name of my VERY FAVORITE children's book by Jeri Hanel Watts. It is not one that is often shared, but it is a beautiful story of a young boy who learns the power of passing down stories in a family and a Grandmother that learns that all people can be "Keepers" of family stories.

11. Kelly and Keven - Weird that these names would pop up...but they represent two of my chidlhood friends. I lost touch with Kelly long ago, but Keven still lives in our hometown and I see he and his family every so often when I am up visiting there.

12. KFC - I like this place, truly I do. It represents, however, a funny family story for us (a Keeper?). When DH and I lived in #8, we were driving home one time and passed a large billboard that said "Birthplace of Kentucky Fried Chicken". I looked at my young DH and said, "I didn't know that Kentucky Fried Chicken was made in Kentucky." I must admit that after the long pregnant pause in the car, I wanted to move to #4! It's not uncommon for someone to ask me (21 years later) when we pass one, "Do YOU know where Kentucky Fried Chicken comes from?"

13. Keynote - I've been able to give several keynotes in my career. I really enjoy this. Between us, though, I wonder if that would have happened if they knew my KFC "secret"?

K was not as hard as I thought....but I'm glad there aren't 14!!

Labels: All About Me, Thursday Thirteen

DS 4 enjoyed cooling off in Grandpa's pool.